Why I Seek.

“The wilde is not an escape, but a heart-connected stillness.”

Let that settle in. The reason you seek wilde is not to escape your situations, but rather face them. Recently, I’ve been offered a few cool opportunities that have weighed me down. I became so focused for a time on deciding whether or not to take them that it began to encroach on all other priorities. The amount of anxiety I was facing around this decision was more than I care to mention. I had admittedly over processed with myself and people leading to an outcome controlling and acceptance seeking perspective. Instead of finding stillness and my own desire, I gave in to what everyone else thought. And instead of choosing surrender, control stepped in out of fear. This is just one honest example, even very recently in my life, where I don’t even have this discipline down. My fears, pain, need for control all get the best of me. AND THAT’S OK. This isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being human. 

Think about how often you lay your head on your pillow to sleep that old friend anxiety wakes up. Just like in my life, this is a sign post of unresolved emotions, unresolved questions or unrecognized thoughts. The outcome of a rhythm of solitude is that even though those questions may never get answered or the pain itself might not go away peace comes, perspectives changes and you become ok with unanswered questions. 

I can find space for this anywhere. But I love finding it in the mountains or the beach or in my house. It’s literally like a fresh perspective and endurance hits me. And I’ve always seen those spaces as a safe place to escape the normal, get present with God and come to grips with what’s really going on in me. Decided stillness does wonders to help push up thoughts, questions and emotions that have intentionally or unknowingly gotten buried. And when this becomes a regular routine I better connect with myself, God and friends because I’m aware and connected to my heart.

Remember this week. You go to the wilde not to get away from people, but to better connect. 

Paul